why do i feel like i've always been forced to grow up?

always been trained to be indepedent regardless money-wise, travelling, studying, practically everything.

when other people's parents would pick them up cause it's late at night, mine would ask me to take the public transport.

when people's parents planned a surprise birthday party for them, i dont even have a proper one. i was waiting all day for my mum to come back just to celebrate my bday with me cause my dad's definition of celebrating is to make me bring out the cake, put the candles on the cake by myself and i've gotta cut the cake and serve it to him. in the end, i gave up. gave up waiting. just cut the damn cake the next morning and ate it.

She wants to go home,
but nobody's home.
It's where she lies,
broken inside.
With no place to go,
no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

but i know life isnt that unfair. i've got my frens and relatives who made my bday a blast =)

...and, when people's parents got them tuition, i had to find mine on my own and even look for my bro's one.

sometimes i feel so bad that i just clammed up.
Built a wall around my heart
I’ll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly
It would fall down while I'm asleep

but u know what? at the end of the day, i feel like i've been acting really childish, grumbling and whining like a lill kid while my parents are out there working hard to earn the cold hard cash for me to spend. it's really time to grow up i guess.